Health Dept: Please Don’t Copulate on Mattress Behind Kroger

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The Delaware Public Health District has asked residents not to copulate on the mattress behind Kroger on Route 23.

Their announcement read:

“There is a mattress behind Kroger on Route 23. Please DO NOT HAVE sex on it. “

Sincerely,

Your Friends at the Delaware Public Health District

“I understand the urge to have sex on dank mattresses stained with bodily fluids and inexplicably dumped in secluded places, ” said Health Commissioner Garrett Guillozet. “But we must not act on those urges. Especially not more than once. It’s unsanitary.”

Illegally dumped mattress behind Kroger in Delaware, Ohio with a message from the Health Department that says "Don't do it!"

Ricardo Paye
Ricardo Paye
Ricardo Paye is a Senior Correspondent with Delaware Ohio News. Born and raised in the Delaware County Fairgrounds, he's a reporter with a deep knowledge of the streets who isn't afraid to ask tough questions. His fondest childhood memory is getting a hand job from a public utility worker in the basement of Pilsner's 5 & Dime store. He holds a bachelor's degree in Euthanasia from Ohio Wesleyan University.

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