Did I vote? Of course I didn’t vote. I am twenty two years old. Voting isn’t ready for me yet.

I didn’t vote because voting is for old people. Everything about it just screams, “If you are smart and know how the world should work, this isn’t for you.” That’s why old people do it. They don’t know how things could and should work, so they keep doing things the old fashioned way.

Old people aren’t smart. They go to stores to buy things instead of making purchases from home. They drive their own cars. They manually move levers around instead of programming machines. They know what labor is. They sit around and talk about things instead of manifesting progress silently from their brain waves. They have no business living in modern society.

That’s why I don’t vote. It wasn’t made for me. It was made for old people. I have everything I want at the touch of my fingertips. You really expect me to arrange transportation, travel somewhere, and wait in line just to make old people decisions? Think again. I’ll vote when a robot can lift me out of bed, drive me to the polls, and push the button for me. Or better yet, when there’s an app on my phone that makes the selection for me.

The answers are obvious. Putting in all this work is unnecessary. When old people finally just get out of the way of progress, this country will be back on the right track.


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