All

Local News

Local News

Highrise Mausoleum Proposed to Council

A local development company's proposal to build a fifty story mausoleum on the city's east side was formally reviewed for the first time last...
Local News

Tornado Almost Hits Ashley

A tornado that was supposed to hit Ashley veered away and hit a neighboring town that nobody really cares about. Ashley resident and carpet...
Local News

Dog Debate Divides Schools

There is a growing debate on whether or not the teaching of Canis lupus familiaris, or dogs, should be allowed in public schools. Many...
Local News

Wind Destroys Roadside Memorial

High wind gusts destroyed a roadside memorial last night alongside U.S. Route 23. Located across from Delaware's Oak Haven Golf Club, the memorial was...
Local News

Assholes Home for Christmas

Dozens of assholes returned to Delaware this year for the holiday season. Some came from college, others from their out-of-state homes, but all returned to...
Local News

Results Are In: Cops Still Pricks

A recent polling of 275 local citizens has confirmed yet again that Delaware Police officers are pricks. The poll found that an overwhelming 99% of...
Local News

Man Kicked Out of McDonald’s for Wearing Vest Plans to Sue Restaurant

Delaware resident Ryan Dennis, 21, plans to sue McDonald's after he was refused service because he was not wearing a shirt. He was only...
Local News

Deer Splits Skull, Saves Life

A deer struck a car early this morning, splitting an old woman's skull and leaving her dead at the scene. Astonishingly, the old woman was...
1...8910Page 10 of 10

Popular

Cocaine Lemur: Missing Pet Goes On Drug-Fueled Rampage in Marysville

Drugs & Rec 0
The saga of the missing red ruffed lemur from...

Revised Short North Curfew Only Applies to Blue-Haired People, Allies

Crime 0
In an announcement that can only be seen as...

Man Jerks Off Into Bucket

Local News 0
A Delaware man is resting today after spending the...

DUI Checkpoints Planned for Columbus Police Parking Lots

Drugs & Rec 0
The Franklin County DUI Task Force will conduct sobriety...

Columbus Police Unveil Black History Month Cruiser, “AFRICA 1”

Local News 0
The Columbus Police Department has unveiled a special edition...
Load more

About Us

Delaware Ohio News is an online news and content source dedicated to Delaware, Ohio. Founded in the year 1808, we strive to be Delaware's premier news source, second only to the illustrious Delaware Gazette. Although we were the first Delaware, Ohio newspaper, they remain the lords of Delaware news media. That's why we're suicidal and on so many drugs.

With all of that said, everything on this website is made up. Do not rely on anything said here.

Don't believe us? Read our Legal Statements

Top Categories:

Hot right now:

Follow on:

Copyright © 2022 Subvertical Limited. All Rights Reserved. Not intended for readers under 18 years of age. Legal Statements & Privacy Policy.