Man decorating dog testicles at Delaware Ohio Arts Festival

The man decorating dog testicles with glitter at the Delaware Arts Festival isn’t doing anything illegal, say local police.

Delaware Police Chief Pigeon Housekey released a statement after receiving several dozen complaints.

“We have received reports of a man decorating dog genitals with glitter at the Delaware Arts Festival. While this may seem inappropriate, it is not against the law,” the statement read. “If he begins jerking them off or placing the shaft of their penises in his mouth, then we will be able to intervene.”

The artist, Mac Pickerington, says he understands that some people find his work discomforting but that dogs with sexy nut sacks make better pets.

“A little twinkle in your dog’s tinkle can transform a regular house pet into a magical beast or titillating satyr,” Pickerington said. “I promise I will not start jerking them off.”

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