All

In-Brief

In-Brief

In-Brief Breaking News: Chick-fil-AIDS Breakout Likely

All food items at the Chick-fil-A on Polaris were tainted with AIDS. So if you stood in solidarity with your gay-bashing brothers and sisters...
In-Brief

In-Brief: Delaware Police Department Begs For Attention With New Gaudy SUV

The Delaware Police Department's brand new, $50,000 dip-shit mobile debuted on the streets of Delaware today. According to Police Chief Russell Martin, the bold...
In-Brief

In-Brief: Teen Finger-Banging Down 11% In April

Teen finger-banging was down 11% city-wide in April, according to a recent poll. Experts speculate that evolution may have played a part in this...
In-Brief

In-Brief: Elton John’s Second Cousin Uses Restroom At Delaware Waffle House

The second cousin of Grammy Award winning musician Elton John used the restroom at Delaware's Waffle House over the weekend. Angela Jones, the child of...
In-Brief

In-Brief: Police Chief Martin Reprimanded For Not Tweeting

Delaware Police Chief Russ Martin has been reprimanded by City Hall for not tweeting about a 14 vehicle pile up that occurred on 36/37...
In-Brief

In-Brief: Strand Theatre Considers Buying A Tiger

Historic downtown movie theater The Strand recently filed paperwork with the city that would approve their plans to buy and house a Bengal Tiger...
In-Brief

In-Brief: Area Cat Sits Around All Day

A Siamese cat in Hayes Colony sits around the house all day, according to its owner. Horse Radish, a 10-year-old cat imported from Arizona,...
In-Brief

In-Brief: Christian Fanatics’ Fantasy World Comes to End Sunday

While Christian fanatics anxiously awaited the end of the real world Saturday, May 21, they were oblivious to the fact that their own fantasy...
In-Brief

In-Brief: John Kasich Denies Emailing Crotch Shot

A lewd picture emailed to delawareohionews.com from an individual claiming to be John Kasich was not sent by the governor, his office claims. Received late...
In-Brief

In-Brief: Mayor Decides Not To Run For President

Delaware Mayor Gary Milner has decided not to run for President in 2012, says a source close to the mayor. "He has to mow the...
123Page 2 of 3

Popular

Downtown Clothing Shop Toujours Announces “Biscuits and Blouses” Event

Local News 0
https://youtu.be/-Ege05lBQFk In a bizarre but fun pairing, local clothing consignment...

Jeffrey Dahmer’s Victims’ Families Sue Budweiser

National News 6
The families of Jeffrey Dahmer's victims are suing Budweiser,...

City Appoints First Black Police Chief

Local News 1
The City of Delaware has appointed Captain Adam Moore...

Delaware Shooting: Drunk Man Targeted Teens Who Laughed at Him

Crime 0
An angry drunk psycho shot at a group of...

The 5 Funniest Heroin Dealers in Delaware, Ohio

Drugs & Rec 0
So you’re addicted to heroin and have to buy...
Load more

About Us

Delaware Ohio News is an online news and content source dedicated to Delaware, Ohio. Founded in the year 1808, we strive to be Delaware's premier news source, second only to the illustrious Delaware Gazette. Although we were the first Delaware, Ohio newspaper, they remain the lords of Delaware news media. That's why we're suicidal and on so many drugs.

With all of that said, everything on this website is made up. Do not rely on anything said here.

Don't believe us? Read our Legal Statements

Top Categories:

Hot right now:

Follow on:

Copyright © 2022 Subvertical Limited. All Rights Reserved. Not intended for readers under 18 years of age. Legal Statements & Privacy Policy.