Nina Wilde

Nina Wilde is a serious writer and journalist. She enjoys bubble baths, cognac, and forcing wealthy white men to eat her shit out of the toilet. She saves all of her menstrual blood to prevent bio-hackers from creating copies of her perfect body and disturbed mind. She has schizophrenia and reads necrophiliac erotica in her spare time. Nina speaks fluent Chinese, Arabic, and Russian.

17 New Craft Breweries Planned for Delaware’s East Side

Delaware is working to cement itself as a destination for craft beer lovers, with seventeen new breweries set to open on the city's East...

Delaware Firefighter Earns Invitation to Narcan Olympics

A Delaware firefighter earned the right to compete in the 2020 Narcan Olympics after successfully reviving his 500th overdose victim during yesterday’s First Friday...

Rare Species of Female Alcoholic Resurfaces, Screams Profanities

Rare Species of Female Alcoholic Resurfaces, Screams Profanities In the past two weeks, residents of Delaware, Ohio have reported sightings of a rare native...

Ohio Wesleyan University President Admits Illiteracy

Jan. 8, 2019 UPDATED: It is a well known fact that the president of Ohio Wesleyan University, Dr. Rock Jones cannot-- in fact-- read or...

Rock Jones Sends International Students Packing

Ohio Wesleyan President Rock Jones shocked the university community today by announcing his support for President Trump’s immigration policies and sharing a drastic plan...

October First Friday Theme Makes No Fucking Sense

Every lot and secret spot was parked up downtown yesterday for Paws & Prevention themed night of confusion. October’s theme was decided by committee during...

New Prosecutor Already Gets How To Abuse Power, Perpetuate Injustice For Own Gain

New assistant prosecutor Jordan Vandemann was heralded by Delaware County Prosecutor Carol O’Brien today for speaking out against Issue 1 and successfully abusing his...

Farm Animals At Fair Ask For Gentle Pats

Fair animals large and small issued a joint statement from the Delaware County Fair this afternoon, aiming to educate children about proper petting zoo...

Crazy Fair Ride Hasn’t Killed Anyone Yet

A new, radically unsafe ride has yet to kill anyone during its debut at the Delaware County Fair, according to ride operator Dead Frog...

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