Delaware Ohio News
The Voice of Delaware, Ohio



Local News

June 8, 2012

Roger Waters, Pink Floyd Co-Founder, Dies Of Dog AIDS At Age 68

More articles by »
Written by: Nat Norton
Tags: , , ,
roger-waters

Roger Waters, legendary musician and founding member of progressive rock band Pink Floyd, died today after a two year battle with a rare form of AIDS most commonly found in dogs. He was 68 years old.

Waters, who was touring on his “The Wall Live” tour was believed to be in good health in recent months and his death came as a surprise to family and friends.

“His case of AIDS was very mild,” said family friend John Heroin. “He used to joke around and start barking before he would vomit or pass out, pretending to be a dog with AIDS.”

Dog AIDS is rarely found in human beings, says Dr. Jean Glimpski of The Ohio State University Medical Center HIV/AIDS Research Center.

“It’s called dog AIDS because dogs get it, not humans,” Dr. Glimpski explained. “Gay humans typically just gets AIDS, which is the most common variation of the syndrome.”

Glimpski said she was surprised a heterosexual male like Waters would have AIDS at all, especially the form typically reserved for canines.

“Gay people account for 99.9% of all AIDS cases,” Glimpski said. “And that’s including the animal variations. I’m not sure how he could have contracted it.”

Waters never explained the origination of his dog AIDS and rarely commented on the illness.

All scheduled 2012-2013 tour stops for “The Wall Live” have been cancelled and refunds are being administered to ticket holders.

 



About the Author

Nat Norton
Nat Norton is a racist homophobe living off the land in the outskirts of Delaware, Ohio.




 
 

 
Roger Waters Knowledge Graph Result

Google Result Link for Pink Floyd’s Roger Waters Says He Died of Dog AIDS

The Google Knowledge Graph image for the query “Roger Waters” is currently linking to a delawareohionews.com article announcing his death from Dog AIDS. Here is a link to the query SERP:¬†https://www.google.com/sear...
by Ricardo Paye
0

 
 
 

Deer Splits Skull, Saves Life

A deer struck a car early this morning, splitting an old woman’s skull and leaving her dead at the scene. Astonishingly, the old woman was scheduled to donate several organs to her granddaughter (and end her own life in t...
by Ricardo Paye
0

 



17 Comments


  1. Steve

    Why is no one else reporting this?


  2. Kim Carroll

    I don’t believe this to be true!


  3. steve your a moron

    It’s because it isn’t real, Steve. It’s supposed to be a satire but the problem is that this “writer” is also a moron, and apparently a homophobe.


  4. Adam Butler

    I am sending this, as a screenshot and a link to Mr. Waters. I hope you enjoyed your time as a “journalist” personally I hope you never can work again… As anything.

    Fuck you, sincerely.
    Adam J. Butler


  5. Adam

    Prepare for a major judicial fist up your asses. I have already sent this article to Mr. Waters and his record label. You must be the dumbest fucking news agency of all time… You cannot feign real news, and fake news dumbfucks you are not fox news. You’re going to pay for this, and dearly.


  6. [...] Graph image for the query “Roger Waters” is currently linking to a delawareohionews.com article announcing his death from Dog Aids.See our Facebook post for more information: [...]


  7. A square fan

    Keep up the good work, Ricardo. The lols are appreciated and I will continue reading.


  8. Gloria

    Freaking golden. I can’t stop crying from laughing.


  9. Woman

    Anyone who gets their news from delaware Ohio news is just plain sad and ignorant. It is a sad thing to live in this town.


  10. Woman

    Nat Norton is a racist homophobe living off the land in the outskirts of Delaware, Ohio.

    Lol


  11. really

    I swear i read this stuff and its as funny as the story of the principal fucking the vice principal.


  12. Tobias Brand

    You guys will pay dearly for this. He actually died from normal aids.


  13. FF-Ed

    Oh My! I’m in tears, that is by far the funniest sh**, I’ve read online in a long time. Guys here at the station are ROTFL. We are adding you to favorites!
    Keep up the good work!!! ***also @Tobias -that funny!


  14. Hi all. I ran across your current web site the employment of ask. That is a rather well written report. I’ll be sure to take note of it as well as come back to learn added of this handy information and facts. Wanted posting. I’ll surely return.



Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>